A friend of mine,a brilliant one had always been a figure of inspiration for me since my seventh grade.A personification of happiness and an epitome of a man who knew how to live life happily,the way it is meant to be,he has always instilled in me a desire to live the same way he does it.
He was more of an inwardly person,in the sense that he used to be a person not concerned with the shallow idiosyncrasies of the world.Whatever he did,he used to do with his heart.
"What you do is not really important.How you do,whether you are doing it with the consent of your heart or not,is what matters,and what gives us the satisfaction we are craving for," he used to say."You may be having a million dollars,but what will you do with them when you don't have a person to share all your wealth with?And if you are looking for just some person,why not share it with a beggar?So the point is you always need a person who you can relate your heart with in your life."
Perhaps he was right,but his philosophically sounding words kind of repelled me.At least for my shallow mind which always obeyed the law of the world,"Go with the herd",while in actuality they did appear true to me at times.
After a long gap of about four years,I met him recently in the city of his residence.Contrary to what I expected,he did change.In fact,what I realised soon was my responsibility-to provide a good shoulder for him to cry on!
He said that he had loved a girl.And some story.And then they are done with each other.
He used the word heart at least two dozen times.I felt worried.
When we see a girl and get attracted to her,what are we really attracted to?Most of us to looks,few of us to which-you-know-but-shall-not-be-mentioned-here.And similarly when we want a girl to be attracted to us,what do we do?We tend to bolster our hairstyles and skin-tones.We build big round muscles.We wear only branded apparel,or study hard and get a nice job.Because we seem to know from the gut precisely what attracts the opposite sex.And the answer is,yes, you are right, our heart!
All the gyms and beauty parlors are present to encourage this winning-the-heart business,thank you very much!
Once we get into a relationship after the initial communication between the two hearts,what do we long for?Maintaining it.We change our priorities and even the way we live so that the person we lost our heart to doesn't get offended!
To what end?To cop a feel.To entertain our mind with whatever is on offer.Ultimately,to feel the rubbing of the genitals together.So much for losing our heart to someone!
Yet,we always love to believe that Lord Kamadeva has shot the two of us with his arrow of love and exchange of hearts!We even start believing the concept of soul-mates,though it's a different issue that we hardly believe in a soul.
When I heard the word 'love' from him,my mother immediately came to mind.She happily carried me for nine months in her womb.She cleaned my stool,and tolerated whatever stupid things I did when I was a child.She still loves me.And I'm sure she'll continue to care for me all the way till my grave with the same degree of selflessness.
And when he said 'Relationship',immediately my sister came to my mind.Recently she married my bro-in-law.And yes,I can clearly see that they are getting into a relationship.A mutual understanding of what they did-they committed themselves to one another.A mutual understanding that they are going to live together in this world for a fairly long time,and that not only they shouldn't make each other's lives miserable,but also that they have to strive to make them as merry as they can!
I concluded that he made a mistake.The mistake of not applying whatever is in his store of wisdom.The kind of feelings he experienced for her only overshadowed what really he felt - a strong sense of bad urge that is so prevalent in the teenage and the pre-adult age.In the language of a computer scientist,it's not always WYSIWIG! If he had understood that, he wouldn't have been like this today.
If we understand that, we wouldn't be like that in the future.